Saturday, November 12, 2005
The Leftist Dictionary
The 'Leftist' Dictionary! Never again will you be stuck on what some daft liberal just said - consult this handy translation device and you'll understand!
Leftist Speak -- Definition
Foetus -- Baby
The right to die -- The right of someone else to kill you
This shouldn't be an election issue -- This might lose us votes
Investment -- Spending
Society -- The state
Community -- The state
Nation -- The state
Our "so-called" democracy -- Democracy
You can't impose democracy -- We sure wish you wouldn't remove dictators by force
The government ignores the wishes of the people -- The government has not yet been formed by George Galloway
Neoconservative -- Jew
International law -- Whatever's fine by Russia, China and France
Secular -- Atheist
Multi-faith -- Everything/nothing is true
Respect other cultures -- Excuse honour killings and public stonings
Rational -- The stuff we believe.
Reducing poverty -- Increasing dependency
Yes X was a great man, but… -- X didn’t agree with us on everything
The Church has held back the fight against AIDS -- People who ignore Catholic teaching on sex outside marriage really care what the Pope says about condoms
Achieving equality -- Discrimination against middle-aged white men
This is a sensitive issue -- I will be hounded out of office, possibily shot and killed if i happen to wander from the politically correct line
justice -- when we succeed
A belief in God -- [offensive] A belief in God
wealth distibution -- forceably taking money from people who earned it
He is Left-wing -- He is a Communist
He is a Centrist -- He is left wing
He is Right wing -- He is a fascist
He is Far right -- He is a blood drinking Nazi who shouldn't be allowed amongst civilised society
He is Ultra/Extreme right wing -- He is Christian
To play on peoples fears -- To address peoples concerns and attempt to offer solutions
Populist politics/playing for votes -- To talk about things average people care about
War for Oil! -- We haven't seen the news for 3 years and have formulated no new arguments
You are ignorant -- You do not think like we do
You are a Bigot -- You do not think like we do AND i have no counter to what you think
You are a f***ing stupid m*therf****r -- You do not think like we do AND i have no counter to what you think AND even i realise that i have lost the argument
Just world -- a politically left-leaning world
In the modern world.../But this is the 21st century!... -- We will justify our argument for ignoring and disrespecting the moral rules on which society is based by making the highly intellectual assersion that time has passed
Be compassionate! -- pay more in taxes
Do the responsible thing! -- pay more in taxes
Show your fellow man you care! -- pay more in taxes
Of course we support your business, BUT... -- while we look on your efforts to provide for you and your family yourself with mild bemusement; we do feel, on balance, that you should pay more in taxes
we must make the most of our country's wealth... -- we must invest in our public services, and as people are more well off, they should pay more in taxes to pay for it
you heartless, evil man -- you do not wish to pay more in taxes
Spending on school dinners will go up to fifty pence per meal! -- Would you like ketchup with your Turkey Twizzlers?
Because of the unique way the BBC is funded… -- Because of the BBC’s unique lack of accountability…
X is a senior Conservative… -- Never heard of the guy until he made that gaffe / took that money / lost his trousers
X was a senior and respected Conservative… -- Never heard of the guy until he defected to us.
X was a senior and respected Conservative who could have won the next election -- Ken Clarke
Leftist Speak -- Definition
Foetus -- Baby
The right to die -- The right of someone else to kill you
This shouldn't be an election issue -- This might lose us votes
Investment -- Spending
Society -- The state
Community -- The state
Nation -- The state
Our "so-called" democracy -- Democracy
You can't impose democracy -- We sure wish you wouldn't remove dictators by force
The government ignores the wishes of the people -- The government has not yet been formed by George Galloway
Neoconservative -- Jew
International law -- Whatever's fine by Russia, China and France
Secular -- Atheist
Multi-faith -- Everything/nothing is true
Respect other cultures -- Excuse honour killings and public stonings
Rational -- The stuff we believe.
Reducing poverty -- Increasing dependency
Yes X was a great man, but… -- X didn’t agree with us on everything
The Church has held back the fight against AIDS -- People who ignore Catholic teaching on sex outside marriage really care what the Pope says about condoms
Achieving equality -- Discrimination against middle-aged white men
This is a sensitive issue -- I will be hounded out of office, possibily shot and killed if i happen to wander from the politically correct line
justice -- when we succeed
A belief in God -- [offensive] A belief in God
wealth distibution -- forceably taking money from people who earned it
He is Left-wing -- He is a Communist
He is a Centrist -- He is left wing
He is Right wing -- He is a fascist
He is Far right -- He is a blood drinking Nazi who shouldn't be allowed amongst civilised society
He is Ultra/Extreme right wing -- He is Christian
To play on peoples fears -- To address peoples concerns and attempt to offer solutions
Populist politics/playing for votes -- To talk about things average people care about
War for Oil! -- We haven't seen the news for 3 years and have formulated no new arguments
You are ignorant -- You do not think like we do
You are a Bigot -- You do not think like we do AND i have no counter to what you think
You are a f***ing stupid m*therf****r -- You do not think like we do AND i have no counter to what you think AND even i realise that i have lost the argument
Just world -- a politically left-leaning world
In the modern world.../But this is the 21st century!... -- We will justify our argument for ignoring and disrespecting the moral rules on which society is based by making the highly intellectual assersion that time has passed
Be compassionate! -- pay more in taxes
Do the responsible thing! -- pay more in taxes
Show your fellow man you care! -- pay more in taxes
Of course we support your business, BUT... -- while we look on your efforts to provide for you and your family yourself with mild bemusement; we do feel, on balance, that you should pay more in taxes
we must make the most of our country's wealth... -- we must invest in our public services, and as people are more well off, they should pay more in taxes to pay for it
you heartless, evil man -- you do not wish to pay more in taxes
Spending on school dinners will go up to fifty pence per meal! -- Would you like ketchup with your Turkey Twizzlers?
Because of the unique way the BBC is funded… -- Because of the BBC’s unique lack of accountability…
X is a senior Conservative… -- Never heard of the guy until he made that gaffe / took that money / lost his trousers
X was a senior and respected Conservative… -- Never heard of the guy until he defected to us.
X was a senior and respected Conservative who could have won the next election -- Ken Clarke
# posted by Chris Hughes @ 5:25 am 
